Dave Mancino knew the stats full well when he opted to join the Navy SEALs. Only 15-20 percent of applicants end up making it through the training. He shared his story – and advice – with independent retailers at PrimeTime, and the message was one that resonated on more levels than we could have imagined.

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Rob Stott: All right, we are back on the Independent Thinking Podcast, coming to you from Prime Time in Las Vegas and excited to be joined by Mr. Dave Mancino coming fresh out of the core member meeting. Is that what it was, giving a presentation?

Dave Mancino: Yes. Just coming off that. I appreciate you having me here. It’s good to be here.

Rob Stott: Absolutely. So a Navy SEAL.

Dave Mancino: Correct.

Rob Stott: Be the first on the podcast, I get to interview a Navy SEAL. So appreciate you sitting down and taking the time. This is awesome to be able to do.

Dave Mancino: Thank you.

Rob Stott: So what was the vibe like in the room? We’ll start there.

Dave Mancino: So I have no idea when I am up there, what’s resonating. But I assume it’s being taken on board, because rather be confident whether it’s working or not. But overwhelmingly positive after the fact. I feel like the message, and my experience is I think they’re important and valid. And yeah, so far the feedback has been overwhelmingly positive.

Rob Stott: What is that message at a high level? We’ll dive into it.

Dave Mancino: Yeah absolutely.

Rob Stott: But at a high level, kind of give that overview on what you said to these members that are here.

Dave Mancino: So essentially it’s a condensed version of the SEAL team’s Naval Special Warfare. And the SEAL team specifically are what makes us so successful. And starting from the training, BUD/S, which is basic underwater demolition SEAL training has about 80, 85% attrition rate. So I went over, only 15 to 20% of the people that show up to want to become SEALs actually get to the end there. And I tried to kind of convey why those people quit and they’re not there at the end, and what makes the ones that make it to the end, what’s the reason for that.

And there’s no great… or else I’d be probably a millionaire with the book, there’s no great answer, but there’s some key things that the people that are successful share. Just when we talk about mental toughness, resiliency building. One of the main things and my main giveaway in the speech is something that’s really adverse, such as training for the SEALs. If you look at it as this one huge obstacle, it’s mentally daunting. It’s majority mental is why the guys don’t make it. Because physically fit. And so my big give and what worked best for me, and it’s overly simplified, is you chunk it up, and I go, “Meal to meal.” That’s my secret, right? At some point we’re going to get fed food. You can’t really meditate, you can’t really go to any philosophical thing or spiritual thing, maybe at least not for me. It was something tangible, which was food. And I know it sounds silly, but if I am eating right now and then I can make it to the next meal, and keep doing that, and eventually this will end.

Rob Stott: It’s the mental muscle, the brain, the one muscle that might get overlooked in a situation like that. Obviously it’s a strategy you can come up with and it worked for you. Did you have to work at it? What was it like to get to a point where that was a successful sort of way of approaching what you went through?

Dave Mancino: Yeah, that’s a great question, because no one has really asked me what started that. And I don’t think I had that plan when I started, going through training. I think I had an epiphany while I was eating. I’m like, “All right, I’m eating right now. No instructors yelling at me. This is a good place.” And you have no watch, no sense of time or anything like that. And I knew that, well, if I actually can just do this again-

Rob Stott: Well that shows adaptability on the fly.

Dave Mancino: Yeah, it’s-

Rob Stott: Which I think is another theme that could resonate with this audience.

Dave Mancino: Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. That’s one of the points I talk about with… You know? If something wasn’t working or hasn’t been working, whether it’s in business, be adaptable, and yeah, I guess I willed that on myself. But yeah, and for me, this is me personally, it worked. And I know, talking with other guys, maybe they didn’t do the meal to meal, but the guys that made it through, they would chunk it up into the smaller. And the guys that didn’t, they said it was just so overwhelming. The guys that weren’t successful. We’re going through the same thing. It’s just your approach, how you look at it. That’s the only difference.

Rob Stott: I mean, not to talk about the same thing just in a different way, but that mentality, that mindset, it shows that you could be as skilled as anyone in a certain thing, but if you’re not willing to be adept mentally or get yourself in that right frame of mind, it doesn’t matter. You could be the strongest man in the world, you won’t make it through.

Dave Mancino: Absolutely. No, 100%. And there was people that showed up to SEAL training to BUD/S. I remember watching this guy, he knocked out, I think it was, 40 something pull ups.

Rob Stott: Wow.

Dave Mancino: Which was… Good, is high twenties. And I’m like, “Wow, that guy can do almost double what I can do.” And I was passing all the tests. And he ended up quitting a couple days later. And some people look at that as like, “Oh, if he can’t make it through, how am I going to make it through?” And there’ll be people that’ll quit after someone they think is strong, quits. Where, I took it as “Well, I guess I was stronger than him this whole time. He could do more pull-ups than me. Great. But…” And I would use that a little selfishly like a small victory, like, “Well, he’s not here anymore, and he was supposedly a strong one.”

Rob Stott: Yeah, I talk about that resonates incredibly right now at a time where independent retailers are fighting every day. And I don’t know if you follow retail news in general, but we lost a couple big dealers that are out there. Those Goliaths if you will, that succumb to the economy, but also just some factors that… You know? Not remaining disciplined in kind of what they were doing. And you see them fold, opens up the door to these independent retailers that are adaptable, that stay sort of present and persistent in what they’re doing. And they’ve got a great opportunity in front of them now, because of that.

Dave Mancino: Yeah, there’s more market share.

Rob Stott: Exactly. It’s incredible.

Dave Mancino: Exactly.

Rob Stott: But we’ll dive into you a little bit. We’ll get into your background. So the idea to become a SEAL and want to take that path, tell us a little bit about yourself and what got you there.

Dave Mancino: Sure, that’s a great question, and I don’t have the greatest answer for that, because I can’t tell you when exactly the idea of becoming a Navy SEAL kind of crept in my head. I don’t have any family members that are prior military. This was 100% on me. At some point, maybe around 14, 15 years old, starting high school, the idea popped into my head, military. And then there was actually a documentary, a Discovery Channel documentary on going through BUD/S Seal training. I remember watching that, and just thinking it looked really hard, it looked really challenging. I was always really comfortable in the water. I scuba dived, starting at 13, and there was a lot of water in that with SEAL training.

And the one thing, I think the reason I wanted to go that route, besides the water, is any of the books or movies, or any specials I saw, they seemed like they weren’t really in the military. Meaning there’s Marines, army, they do fighting, same thing that I was kind of going after, but their discipline was in the pressed uniforms and the haircuts and the marching. And I was like, “Yeah, I want to just look like when I’m out on the street, and you have no idea what my job is. And it worked out. But that kind of planted the seed. What actually made me, “Hey, this is what I want to do,” was I was a senior in high school when 9/11 happened and the terrorist attacks.

I was in my math class, I remember they had a TV on in there. We turned the TV on, “Hey, the twin towers are on fire.” And we watched live, the second plane hit and realized it wasn’t an accident. And I remember at that point, I’m 17, kind of don’t know what I want to do with my life. A little bit, but the idea of being a SEAL was there, and you’re like, “We will see what happens.” But right after that, there was a collective sadness by everybody, but I remember feeling really anxious and almost nervous. Like, “This is real now. Now I have to grow up.” And so I decided then and there, this is what I want to do.

Rob Stott: Wow. No, that’s, I mean, probably not too uncommon for some guys, not necessarily seals, but other…

Dave Mancino: That generation.

Rob Stott: … branches as well that see that and go through that. I think I was in eighth grade, so maybe a little young for it. But you get that, that makes a lot of sense.

Dave Mancino: Yeah, so that’s, kind of my… I believe. I wish there was one point where, like, “Yeah, this is exactly what I know I want to do.” I think it just slowly crept in and then an event like that, sealed it.

Rob Stott: Yeah. So, just the spark that you needed to ignite the flame of what it became. So no, that’s pretty cool. Now you watch Discovery, you see all these movies, was it what you expected going through it?

Dave Mancino: So the documentaries, yeah, they’re pretty spot on. The drama series and movies, and I’ll be perfectly honest, I don’t watch a lot of them. Because-

Rob Stott: Probably for the better.

Dave Mancino: Probably for the better. Yeah, I’ll ruin it, and anyone watching with me, I’ll probably ruin it for them. But it’s drama. If it were real, I don’t know how much they could even air, how appropriate it would be.

Rob Stott: Understandable.

Dave Mancino: But they look the part, I’ll tell you that much. Whoever they have consulting on these shows-

Rob Stott: Good casting. That’s about it. That’s where it ends.

Dave Mancino: Yeah, that’s where it ends.

Rob Stott: No, that’s great. So did you ever get to a point going through it, and I have to imagine you come up with that kind of way of getting through it, the mental aspect of it, but did you ever get to a point where you’re like, “Maybe I made the wrong decision”?

Dave Mancino: So my memory gets a little fuzzy from lack of sleep and everything. I don’t remember any time where I said I’m going to quit. I remember multiple times thinking, I don’t want do this particular evolution, whether it be being in the cold Pacific Ocean, running with a boat or log on my head, thinking, “Yeah, I’d rather not be doing this.” But I don’t think, and most of the guys that I’ve talked to, going through, there was never really a point where it’s like, “Yeah, I just can’t do this anymore.” It was more of, “Yeah, this is really hard. I recognize that, I’m not delusional. But this is what I have to do to get to my end state. So kind of put up with that.

And on the flip side of that, I’d have buddies who were like, yeah, going through training, they had that look in their face, like, “I don’t want to do this. I’m just done.” And we’d always, “Hey, no, just make it to the next meal,” or whatever, what was working for me at the time. Like, “Just do this, do this, do this.” And they would go a little bit more, maybe make it to the next evolution, but ultimately they quit. Because they’d already decided. So I think that that decision internally, if that doesn’t happen, you will get to where you need to be.

Rob Stott: No, that’s a great point. And it shows that, again, it’s a mind state that you have to be in. The second you admit it, then it’s going to be kind of like… From a business perspective, if you admit that “It’s not going to happen for me,” then it starts setting the wheels in motion that… You set your own fate, if you will.

Dave Mancino: Yeah, the self-fulfilling prophecy. Absolutely.

Rob Stott: No, that’s incredible. One thing I’ve heard, I didn’t get a chance to sit in the session, but I’ve been told a lot, your even-keeledness. Right? You could kind of see, if you’re watching or even just listening, just a very… I think Jorge told us what, 72 beats per minute is just constant state for you. How do you get to that? What is that about, and how do you get there?

Dave Mancino: Yeah, so-

Rob Stott: Asking for a friend.

Dave Mancino: Yeah, certainly. Absolutely. I mean, yeah, part of it is personality to begin with. With everything, it’s practice. One of the things like going through training that you realize is emotions are, I don’t say a bad thing, but they get you into that mindset that gets you off your path. So it’s a practice thing. Like, “Hey, I’m not going to get too up when things are good.” And celebrate, right?

Rob Stott: Sure.

Dave Mancino: Don’t be a robot, you have feelings. But if I don’t get too high when things are good, then that means I won’t go too far down when things aren’t good, if I stay that. And it’s just practice.

Rob Stott: Are you analytical by nature? Is there a lot of that to it too? You think things through?

Dave Mancino: Absolutely. I’m a skeptic, and I mean, it’s like I have a pro-con list in my head with things. And even quitting training, right? Pro, I’m going to be warm and my life… I don’t say lifelong, but my, at that point in my life, dream will be gone. It’s like, all right, that’s an easy… When you look at it logically, and I think we lack a lot of that nowadays in popular culture and just society and politics, and in general. And when you just think logically, and it’s kind of simple. I tell people it’s simple. It’s not easy. Not easy to do something.

Rob Stott: I know. It’s easy to have a knee-jerk reaction to something.

Dave Mancino: Absolutely.

Rob Stott: And not so easy to sit back, kind of process everything. And again, great sort of value to take in life, but also just thinking about our members that are here and who you’re talking to and delivering this message to, a great approach to business and just not being knee-jerk in the decisions you make about how to run a business or what direction you want to take things.

Dave Mancino: Absolutely. And I hope the message came across, like we said, the feedback seemed great, because I think it does apply. It applies to life and business especially. And these post-COVID retail years are different. So can you control that necessarily? You don’t get upset about the things that you can’t control. What you can control, you have to adapt and put your focus into that.

Rob Stott: So what you’re doing today, you’re retired. I’ve never retired, right? That’s not the thing. Right?

Dave Mancino: Actually, in a couple months I’ll be fully retired.

Rob Stott: Okay. All right. So the post SEAL life, how’s it been adapting to that? And I know obviously you having some great success with it on the speaking, you author, you mentioned a book?

Dave Mancino: No, no, no.

Rob Stott: Or no?

Dave Mancino: I said I could write a book…

Rob Stott: Oh, could write a book.

Dave Mancino: … if I knew the answer…

Rob Stott: Well, maybe you know.

Dave Mancino: … to what makes a good SEAL, right? Yeah. Maybe.

Rob Stott: Someday.

Dave Mancino: Right now it’s a pamphlet.

Rob Stott: So talk about the adjustment.

Dave Mancino: Yeah, yeah. so the adjustment, it’s different. People ask, do I miss it? Absolutely. I am married, I have two kids. It took a lot of time away from them. So the fact that I’m home and able to… The fulfillment is different. I got the fulfillment. I was on a SEAL team during two wars, deployed. We used all our… Everything we trained for, we used in the real world, and I’m good. I’m good with it. I got my fill. Now my focus is being a good father. I’m a coach on my son’s baseball team, I’m training my oldest one how to lift weights and get stronger. So that’s easy. The hard thing is the caliber of people that I’ve worked with.

I feel like I have to accept that I’ll never professionally be in an environment quite like that. But the trade-off is my family life. The trade-off is experiencing things like this, with meeting the people here, how appreciative they are. And it’s a different audience, but equally as fulfilling.

Rob Stott: Yeah. No, that’s awesome.

Dave Mancino: For me, so far it’s been good. Maybe in a couple of years from now I’ll try to re-enlist and get back in. I hope not.

Rob Stott: No, that’s incredible man. Well, we’re appreciative of you being here with us and sharing the story and your message. I think if you’re hanging around for our keynote, I think a lot of those same themes that you talked about will carry over to the message that we’ve got here for our members more broadly. But appreciate you taking the time too. This was great to chat and get you on the podcast and glad to have your first podcast under your belt.

Dave Mancino: Yeah, first time.

Rob Stott: Now that we’re done, do you think you could do this again?

Dave Mancino: Yeah. Yeah, absolutely.

Rob Stott: No, it was awesome. Well, thank you. Enjoy the rest of your time here, and we we’ll talk again soon.

Dave Mancino: Thank you. It was a pleasure doing it. I appreciate your time.